Day 4- Concrete Details

I got day 3 posted yesterday, but not day 4.  This Internet thing is a pain!  However, the extra time did let me mull over a few options for this poem.  We’re supposed to writ about an abstract thing using concrete nouns or adjectives.

I started writing about true, all consuming heartbreak like what I went through last October.  At first, the idea seemed so easy to write, until I sat to do so.  I couldn’t find the right words or images for what I wanted to evoke.  Instead, I tried to capture the heartbreak to healing cycle, eventually ending in the OK/recovered stage.  I’m not sure if it worked, but I think it’s a good start for something larger down the road.

A ton of bricks crushing every bone
Into a fine powder you can never clean up.
It swirls into the air in fitful patterns
Clogging lungs until it nearly chokes the life out
Before the rain comes
Pushing everything back to the earth
Freeing the air and letting light through.
Tulips and cherry blossoms begin to bloom
Birds sing overhead in soft melodies
Until the thunder arrives
Darkening the skies
Forcing everything to run for shelter
Until it passes once more
And the sun arrives again.


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