Pity

This past Saturday, I saw my ex for the first time in weeks.  I used to see him almost every other day, and then nothing, so I was quite concerned about him.  I decided to write this poem about what I witnessed that night, and all I could feel for him was pity.  There was nothing else there– no lingering emotions (which I thank my current boyfriend for), no wishing or longing, absolutely nothing other than pity and concern.  It’s sad to see him to do this to himself, and even sadder that he knows he’s doing it to himself. All I hope for is that someday, he finds what he’s looking for/ needs.

PITY

I see you standing there
Beer in your right hand
Flask in your left
Looking forlorn at what was ahead
Even though it was simply a hockey game

We talk because I need to see how you are
You disappeared for weeks
I began to worry more than I should
After all, I once loved you
And still feel something for you
I guess I just care

But all I can feel is pity
Watching you drown yourself
That amber liquid making you fuzzy
Changing you into something you’re not
Except you’ve made that you
No one knows any different

I want to scream at you
Tell you to stop destroying yourself
That our past is in the past
All I want is for you to be happy
It makes me cry inside to see you do this
To watch you destroy what I see

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